


Peas and Carrots

by rumbleroarsslumberingcubs



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:47:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24707050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rumbleroarsslumberingcubs/pseuds/rumbleroarsslumberingcubs
Summary: Abed panics right as his best friend and everything is about to leave. Troy helps him get through it.
Relationships: Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir
Comments: 6
Kudos: 109





	Peas and Carrots

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is my second Trobed story and I'm super excited to post! Spoilers for Parks and Recreation and Forrest Gump. Title in reference to Forrest Gump. Enjoy!

Saying goodbye to Troy is the hardest thing Abed will ever have to do in his entire life. Or, at least he thinks it is.

So, it takes all of his strength not to break down in his best friend’s arms.

And when he thinks he’s made it, that both he and Troy are managing to get through such an emotional goodbye, he hears his own breathing grow shallower and faster paced.

And Abed is well aware of the fact that Troy knows exactly what that sound means.

Of course he does. He’s grown accustomed to helping Abed deal with his panic attacks; however, it seems as though he’s never gotten used to the horrible, gasping sounds Abed makes.

“Hey man, just try to breathe,” Troy says softly, in a voice meant to comfort his friend.

He knows better than to touch him when he’s like this. However, Abed likes the way Troy’s voice sounds, so talking is okay.

Touching is bad but talking is okay. He feels grounded when Troy speaks.

Which is kind of what makes this whole thing so terrifying.

Who will talk to him when Troy is gone? Who will make him feel like he still exists, like he isn’t floating into the atmosphere and burning up and shriveling and choking and dying?

“Everything is cold,” Abed manages to choke out as his big, brown eyes grow larger. He’s desperately looking to Troy for answers, who seems just as terrified and possibly (probably) on the verge of tears.

“Abed, are you alright?” Annie murmurs, trying to shift his focus to her own voice, probably so Troy can leave without feeling guilty.

“What do you mean?” the former football player asks so gently Abed can tell he’s afraid of breaking him.

What if he’s _already_ broken?

What if the only thing keeping him from falling to pieces is Troy himself?

“It’s freezing, Troy, can’t you feel it?” Abed exclaims as terror floods through him.

He’s clutching at his friend’s arm now, silently begging him to understand but Troy is clearly lost.

Abed knows Troy wants to agree with him, to nod along with him and tell him that it is so cold that he needs a sweater, a coat, _and_ a blanket.

But things are serious right now. Troy isn’t going to play around and indulge him like he usually does.

So, he continues on, blurting out the words before he can even think about them.

“It’s _freezing_ , Troy,” Abed repeats simply, though his eyes are wild, and Troy knows his best friend is falling to pieces.

“It’s like the lava,” he continues, “but now it’s ice. It’s everywhere. But no one can see it. You can’t even see it. There’s an icicle growing on the tip of my nose, so cold it’s burning me, giving me frostbite, but no can even see it!”

Troy’s chest is heaving and Abed can tell that he’s starting to panic as well, which only makes the taller boy feel even more guilty and terrible.

“Can I hold your hand?” Troy asks quietly and, surprising even himself, Abed nods.

“It’s cold, though,” Abed warns because he can’t seem to help himself, and he doesn’t want Troy to get hurt.

Troy nods and smiles weakly, “Thanks for the warning. You know, sometimes I feel pretty cold, too.”

Abed knows that Troy is trying to say the right thing, but the idea of his friend pretending just to make him feel better actually just makes the taller boy feel nauseous.

“ _It’s not real_ , Troy,” Abed whispers and he’s trying (and failing) to remember how to be normal, “I’m really not trying to be so crazy. I don’t want to be crazy like this, but I _am_ and that’s so un—”

Troy shakes his head instantly and Abed knows it’s because he is being so awful to himself, but he just can’t seem to stop.

“You’re not crazy, buddy,” Troy soothes, hesitantly placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, “What you see is real to you.”

Troy’s right, of course. He pretty much always is, at least when it comes to Abed, which is why he doesn’t shrug away the former football player’s touch.

Troy, somehow, is exempt from the no touch rule and he always has been.

If Shirley were to reach out and touch him, or any of the others, Abed knows his skin would feel like it’s melting.

But Troy’s touch is welcome because it’s making him feel safe. Far safer than any one person’s touch ever had in his entire life.

Abed’s attention is brought back to Troy when he speaks sweetly, if not a little fearfully, “How can I make the ice go away? C-could we clone ourselves again?”

Abed can tell from the helpless look on his face that Troy knows his suggestion would never work, but he appreciates the effort.

Abed’s not sure when he first realized that that he could read Troy’s face a little easier than he could read anybody else’s.

Maybe it’s because Troy is so expressive and doesn’t often try to hide his feelings.

Or maybe it’s because Abed has done everything in his power to memorize that face, to understand its quirks and expressions, because all he wants in life is to be a good friend to Troy.

Yet, here he is, ruining his best friend’s big moment by being selfish and emotional.

“I can’t clone myself again. Then I wouldn’t even be myself anymore,” Abed explains and he feels guilty because he should just do it.

He should just clone himself away until he is an emotionless robot (everyone already thinks of him as one, anyways), a shell of himself.

Then at least Troy won’t have that awful, tearful look on his face.

“Okay,” the younger boy sniffles, “Just tell me what will help.”

He’s determined to fix things. Abed knows he is.

Troy is the one who fixes Abed.

Always.

“I can’t tell you,” Abed says simply and he looks away quickly to avoid seeing a tear roll down Troy’s cheek.

“Yes, you can!” he exclaims, “Best friend rule number three: we can tell each other _anything_.”

Abed simply shakes his head, avoiding eye contact as he so often does.

He can’t bear to look at Troy, even though a small part of him is terrified that he will never, ever get the chance to look at him again.

Troy, seemingly having read Abed’s mind, murmurs carefully, “You know I’m coming back to you, right? This isn’t actually goodbye.”

Abed shrugs; he’s shutting down, locking himself in his own mind, which is never a good sign.

Troy notices and gives his friend’s shoulder a gentle squeeze while looking at him so intensely, Abed can’t help but feel a bit uncomfortable.

“Say the word, Abed, and I’ll stay. I will,” he offers, fiercely protective, “I’ll make the ice go away. I bet I can.”

Abed nods, unable to argue with his friend. However, at the slight look of disappointment on Troy’s face, the taller boy knows he _has_ to argue with his friend.

He has to make sure Troy has his adventure.

“You can make it go away. But I probably can, too.”

Troy is obviously confused, and wants to say something, but clearly has trouble finding the words.

It’s okay because Abed knows exactly what he has to say.

“If I ask you to stay,” he begins hesitantly, “it would ruin everything. You know how in Parks and Recreation how Ben breaks up with Leslie so she can run for office? I have to set you free or you won’t get to fulfill your character arc, and you’ll resent me.”

Troy’s eyes widen at the reference and suddenly he is panicking. Abed’s not entirely sure what he did wrong, so he’s panicking as well.

“B-but, Abed, Ben stops being Leslie’s friend,” he breathes out, so pained and low that it feels like a punch in the stomach to Abed.

The taller boy simply shrugs, “Not forever. Things turn out the way they should. They get married, after all.”

Troy smiles a little at that, and Abed wonders what exactly that might mean.

However, he quickly sobers, “But life isn’t a TV show.”

Troy’s smile fades immediately, and he’s left looking lonelier and more terrified than Abed ever remembers seeing him.

“Yeah, but we’ll fine,” Troy reminds and it’s almost a command, “Nothing’s gonna change between us.”

Abed points his finger upward as he often does when he has a point to make.

He knows he’ll have to say it in a way that doesn’t hurt his best friend, but that can be hard considering how sensitive Troy can be.

“Everything is going to change, Troy,” he says with a sense of finality (while purposefully avoiding his friend’s eyes), “But I still love you. And you’re still my favorite person.”

Abed feels a sense of dread when he realizes that his efforts to be kind have failed miserably.

Troy is beginning to cry, though he’s wiping his tears sloppily with his fists, reminiscent of a child.

“But we’ll still be friends while I’m on my trip. Right?” he asks in a small, delicate voice and suddenly Abed is the one afraid of breaking Troy.

“Probably,” he mumbles, almost hoping that the former football player doesn’t hear him.

“Probably?” he staggers back in horror, “ _What_? Why would you say that? Why would you even think it?”

Troy looks absolutely crushed, like Abed has taken all of his dreams and smashed them into bits.

Like he’s breaking his heart.

“I have to be prepared,” Abed tries to explain, though his voice is weak, “It’s a possibility that we won’t stay friends.”

The taller boy doesn’t know how to articulate that he _longs_ for them to be close forever, but that he has to be ready for things to fall apart.

Because if he isn’t ready, Troy might leave and then _he_ will fall apart.

“You’re wrong,” Troy argues passionately, “Because I love you, too. And there’s no one on Earth I like more than you. And we’re going to stay friends no matter what. Okay?”

Abed knows that he has to agree, even though he isn’t one hundred percent certain.

But then again, why would Troy lie to him? They don’t do that with each other. They don’t lie.

“Okay, Troy,” he finally accepts because he wants nothing more than to believe him.

“Plus, I—I don’t even need Pierce’s money!” Troy splutters with a hint of desperation in his voice that Abed truly hates.

He never intended to make his best friend feel this way.

“I’ll stay here,” the former football player continues, “You just have to tell me what you want.”

Abed knows what he wants. He’s positive of it, in fact. However, he also knows that no matter how easy it would be to accept Troy’s offer, and how much he wants to, he absolutely cannot.

“You have to go, Troy,” Abed insists, steadying his voice so he sounds much calmer than he feels inside.

“You need your own adventure. Like Forrest Gump, and I guess Lavar Burton will be your Lieutenant Dan.”

Abed’s not sure he likes the idea of anyone else being his Lieutenant Dan.

“I’ll go if you promise to send me lots of emails and pick up the phone when I call you. No amount of money is worth losing you,” Troy says genuinely and for some reason, his words make the taller boy feel a bit weak in the knees.

Some of the icy chill in Abed’s bones seems to dissipate.

Troy obviously cares about him, probably more than anyone ever has, and even though he’s going on a fancy trip around the world, he’ll still be there for him. He’ll still love him.

Abed feels as though a bucket of water is coursing through his veins.

“It’s melting, Troy,” Abed realizes with a grin, “ _Thank you_.”

“The ice?” his friend clarifies.

Abed simply nods and marvels at the fact that the temperature of his body finally feels just right.

“Good. So—so, you’ll still be my friend, right?” Troy ensures hesitantly, “Because thinking about us not being friends makes me feel kind of cold. Like maybe I feel the ice, too.”

Abed doesn’t want Troy to feel the ice. It’s the last thing he’d ever want.

Troy’s too full of energy and life to be frozen like that. Abed could never allow his best friend to feel that way.

“You’re my best friend. I was being stupid, letting my fears get the best of me. Of course we’re still friends,” the taller boy confirms vulnerably, but somehow, with Troy, he doesn’t really mind feeling so exposed.

He knows that Troy would never take advantage of his openness, he would never treat it as a weakness.

Troy swallows hard and gently takes his friend’s hand again, ignoring the fact that the rest of the group is looking at them like they’re the stars of a movie.

Abed would probably like that, actually.

“And maybe we’re meant to be more. Maybe when we come back together, after all this is over, like with Jenny and Forrest, we’re supposed to be together,” Troy murmurs as a gorgeous shade of pink dusts his cheeks.

He’s embarrassed by his statement, but Abed doesn’t understand why.

“We are like peas and carrots,” the taller boy agrees.

“Exactly!” Troy replies enthusiastically, seeming a bit more confident, “We’re meant to be together, Abed. Possibly in more ways than one.”

Abed feels like his brain is short-circuiting because Troy can’t actually mean what Abed thinks he means.

Can he?

“Troy, I need you to be very specific in what you’re saying to me right now. None of this can get lost in translation. It’s too important.”

The former football player nods in agreement and looks at his friend with such affection, Abed can feel his cheeks turning red.

“I’m in love with you in a romantic way,” Troy confesses.

Well. That’s as clear as it can possibly get.

“But there’s no pressure for you to feel the same,” Troy begins to ramble, “I don’t even know if you’re into guys. I didn’t really know I was until I met you, actually. But again, there’s no expectation on your end. None at all. So pleas—”

“You don’t have to ramble, Troy,” Abed interrupts matter-of-factly, “I’ve loved you since we improvised a Spanish rap on the couch in the study room. I just made sure not to bring it up. The friends to lovers trope can work out really well for some, but it often turns out disastrous. I wasn’t willing to risk our friendship with unrequited feelings.”

“Plus,” the taller boy added thoughtfully, “the nerdy kid secretly falling in love with the popular jock is so cliché.”

“Cliché?” Troy repeats dumbfoundedly, “Fuck, Abed, _who cares_?”

He’s grinning, even thought Abed thinks his words sound aggressive. Did he make a mistake? Did he say something wrong? He often does when it comes to things like this.

“I’m sorry?” It’s more of a question than an actual apology, but Abed hopes it will do.

“No, no, I’m _happy_ , Abed,” Troy explains warmly, “You’re making me so happy!”

Abed sighs, relieved, and smiles carefully.

“Oh,” he replies breathlessly, “Good. I like when you’re happy.”

Troy is grinning so wide all his teeth are showing, and Abed is certain he’s never seen anyone more beautiful.

“Can I kiss you?” the former football player asks softly. He’s still nervous, but much less than before.

Abed appreciates the question. Consent is important to him; he hates being surprised by touch, even when it’s someone he wants so desperately to touch him.

Abed looks around at the rest of his friends, suddenly remembering their presence, but Troy gently brings a hand to his cheek, drawing Abed’s attention back to him.

“Yeah,” the taller boy agrees, “You can kiss me.”

That’s all it takes for Troy to surge forward, pressing his lips against Abed’s passionately.

His cheeks are still wet from tears, but Abed can feel him smiling into their kiss.

Abed has kissed more people than most would guess, but he’s never felt so _right_ sharing himself with someone like that.

Kissing is nice, fun even, but this kiss surpasses all that. It could never be described in such a casual way.

Because when Abed kisses Troy, it feels like the world makes sense, like the thoughts in his head and the feelings in his body finally make sense.

He doesn’t want to stop. He fells like he _can’t_ stop; Troy’s touch is so addictive.

But eventually, once his lungs are starting to burn, Troy pulls away.

Despite desperately needing air, Abed chases the other boy’s lips, which leaves Troy smirking. He’s obviously thrilled.

“Thank you,” Troy murmurs after placing his hand back on Abed’s cheek, “Now that’s a kiss worth remembering. It’ll make me want to come home even more.”

“Good,” Abed says adamantly, “because I want you to come home.”

Troy nods before promising sweetly, “There was never a question, Abed. I’m so in love with you I can hardly stand it. I have to come back.”

“Alright, alright,” Jeff interrupts casually, though there’s a smile tugging at his lips, “I think Levar Burton over there is about to take this trip on his own. Though we are glad you two finally realize that you wanna be boyfriends, even though you basically have been all along.”

“Yeah,” Troy agrees with an adorable laugh, “Just without the kissing.”

“Which is a major piece of the puzzle that was missing,” Abed explains, as though his addition is of the utmost importance, “Until now.”

“Until now,” Troy confirms with a wink and a dazzling grin.

Abed thinks he’ll be okay now.

He knows he’ll miss Troy, and on some days, it will hurt so bad he won’t know how to get out of bed. 

But when that’s the case, he’ll simply remind himself that Troy loves him, in a heart bursting, bone deep kind of way and that when he comes back, he wants Abed to be his Jenny.

So, Abed simply holds his best friend close and kisses him one more time, making sure to memorize the feeling completely because it’s so undeniably _good_ and because he knows he’ll get to feel this way again.

Because Troy will come back. He said so.

“I love you,” Troy whispers with a final kiss to his cheek, “More than anything.”

“Me too,” Abed manages to choke out.

They clap their hands together twice while tapping their chests at the same time, taking part in the handshake they love so much.

It feels as good as kissing. 

...Well, almost as good.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Likes and comments are so appreciated :)


End file.
